13 - How to Overcome Imposter Syndrome: The Coaching Industry's Epidemic
IMPOSTER ALERT!! Just kidding...but did I trigger your Imposter Syndrome? Well, guess what, it’s more common than you think. In fact, we all have it in some way shape or form and whoever doesn’t is – get this – actually an imposter *gasp*!
“The difference between people who are able to overcome imposter syndrome and people who aren’t is your ability to forgive yourself and believe that you do deserve success.”
– Rachel Bell
In this episode, I’ll share how to identify the symptoms of the syndrome – and how to handle it so it doesn’t cockblock your mission to help people and make money. I’ll also get real and share my personal experiences with Imposter Syndrome and the questions I ask myself and my clients to get through it and move forward. You’ll hear all the ways Imposter Syndrome manifests itself (it ain’t pretty) – and learn how to be the best coach ever, imperfections and all.
Show Notes
01:00 – Introducing today’s topic: Imposter Syndrome (IS).
02:05 – Everyone experiences Imposter Syndrome and needs support through it.
03:10 -Our goal in the coaching industry is to serve and help people – which is a problem if you believe that you can’t or shouldn’t.
03:48 – Common symptoms of IS: Feelings of guilt, shame, fear of rejection, fear of responsibility and that other people would trust you.
05:20 – Some are deathly afraid of disappointing others; believe in yourself and that you are worthy of success.
06:25 – It can be embarrassing to admit that you sometimes doubt yourself.
07:45 – When you first start something, you may be all passion and sharing, but as soon as it turns into a career with a price tag, you psych yourself out.
08:20 – My personal story: Monetizing my passions and when my Imposter Syndrome began to rear its ugly head.
09:30 – My biggest fear was letting someone down and taking energy from someone (in the form of currency) and leaving them unhappy.
10:20 – That experience game me insight on other people’s perception of my gifts and values, and also taught me the worth of what I could provide for others.
11:15 – Imposter Syndrome occurs because everything is subjective – there’s no one truth on what is valuable and what’s not valuable.
12:05 – Your value is up to you – then find the ideal client avatar that finds that value in what you offer.
13:00 – How IS manifests itself: You offer prices that are way too low, you never make an offer, you don’t have boundaries with your clients, and you people-please.
13:54 – Your attentiveness to your clients isn’t in a healthy, loving giving way, it’s out of fear that they won’t be happy.
14:20 – Obsessive learning without ever taking action is another manifestation of IS – you never get experienced, you just get educated and informed.
15:40 – The more you know the more you realize how little you know, so it perpetuates a deeper sense of IS.
17:05 – Constant comparison to others is another symptom of IS.
17:45 – IS is a part of us. It doesn’t define us and needs to be felt and acknowledged in order to pass through.
18:50 – Maybe you feel that you need significance, validation, or security to calm your IS – if so, you need to give those things to yourself, not look for them from the outside.
20:10 – A positive of IS is humility.
21:08 – Be excited, not intimidated by how much you have to learn.
21:45 – IS shows you how much you care about your clients; by caring, you’re already ahead of 99% of the coaches out there.
23:30 – The only people that don’t have IS are actual imposters.
24:15 – Questions to ask to find out if IS is something you should listen closely to or move through.
24:50 –If you had the perfect client that was ready to sign up with $10,000 for you to find a solution could you map out a clear plan for them that would work?
25:40 – If you say “yes”, you need to back up your abilities with evidence and if you say “no” you need evidence and experience.
27:10 – There’s a time and place to offer your services for free or cheap in order to gain experience; however, that’s where you should start, not stay.
27:35 – A cockblocker for getting evidence: Low prices will be an issue if you stay there, because then you’ll attract uncommitted clients that won’t provide the evidence you need to prove results.
29:20 – Another cockblocker: Looking to your clients for validation instead of feedback.
30:40 – Information addiction is another cockblocker – the best coach doesn’t get the client, the best coach at selling gets the client.
31:20 – Marketing is important – if you don’t do it, someone else will, so become addicted to action and making an offer.
32:15– We are right, no matter what we believe, so believe you are ready, good enough, and deserving.
“Imposter Syndrome occurs because everything is subjective – there’s no one truth on what is valuable and what’s not valuable.”
– Rachel Bell
Exercise
Ask yourself: If you had the perfect client that was ready to sign up for $10,000 for you to find a solution, could you map out a clear plan for them that would work? Depending on your answer, do you need evidence, experience, or both? Now go out there and get it!
